chalice26's Diaryland Diary

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Yep, I'm single again!

This is the first day of the rest of my life (and no, I did not quit drinking!). I had a seriously bad day yesterday in which I almost got fired and "found out" that Paul was not with me anymore and that he wanted Megan back. Um, okay. So when I talked to him about it he basically said that he could say whatever he wanted to his friends, regardless of how it affects me at my job, and I said, "Well, if she ran straight over to Megan and told her, I don't think I would consider that a friend." So I was getting ready to go out with Julie, and he said, "Do you want to call me later so we can talk?" And I said, "There's no point in talking about this when we disagree so totally on it." I mean, all I wanted was a simple, "I'm sorry that I didn't think and that my actions (however innocent) caused you drama at work." But he said, "I didn't do anything wrong." And I said, "If you feel that way, then there's nothing to talk about." So he said, "Fine then I'll just take my shit and leave." And I said, "Whatever." And then Julie honked, so I left.

When I got home I didn't want to go in, because I could see that all the lights were on and I thought he might probably still be here. I chalked it up to more fit throwing and pouting than anything else, and even though I wanted it to be over, I didn't think it would be that easy. The first thing I noticed was my house key on the counter, and I was like, "Yay!" He left me the money I just gave him that I had borrowed and the George Forman grill he'd just bought me, which surprised me. So hopefully it really wasn't just a spur of the moment fit type thing and this will be the end.

I had recently come to the realization that I didn't even want to be with him anymore, so mostly the dilemma was now centered on how to get rid of him--which is it's own dilemma, but then he got rid of himself, so it's more like mutual and I don't have to feel guilty about it anymore. I just hope he doesn't do any backpedaling. If he does, I'll just be like, "Look. I meant what I said yesterday, and besides, I don't want to be with someone who walks out the door everytime we have a disagreement anyway."

So all's well that ends well--or at least a million times better than I expected!

2:28 p.m. - 2003-07-12
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