chalice26's Diaryland Diary

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Insanity and Sanitation

Now that everything is starting to happen, or unravel, or get tricky, I find myself just sort of wanting to back out of the whole thing. Someone told me last night that part of them hates me. Me! Great...and the worst part is that he's not even really on my list...fuck! Unfortunately one of his best friends is dating one of my best friends and so we are being somewhat thrown together a lot. But I can deal with him too. Or not if I want. Hmm...I'm so totally freaking out that my brain has actually shut down and so I'm not really thinking about anything. Oh, and all I want to do lately is sleep. Maybe I have clinical depression? No. More like I have had a mild nervous breakdown of some kind. It's very relaxing in a sort of non-existing kind of way...see--I can't even really talk right right now.

This is the part of the story that's REALLY strange: all of a sudden I'm cleaning like crazy--no more slob! Wierd, hu? I've already done half the place (spotless) and I've only been awake today for about two hours all together. That is pretty fucking amazing, coming from me who always says, "Oh, well, I guess I'll do it tomorrow." Wierd.

I think I might actually be losing it...

2:33 p.m. - 2003-06-24
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