chalice26's Diaryland Diary

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30, fat, and facially handicapped

Now the right side of my face is numb--also my gums and part of my tongue. This started coincidentally on my inlaw's last day visiting up here in Dec. As far as I can tell I don't have a scary disease and it's not B. Palsy, because it's the wrong nerve group. So that's good I guess. Yesterday the Dr. put me on Prednisone and a Z-pak. I hate being on Prednisone unless I'm dying from Pneumonia. It really fucks with my head. I get a lot of depression and anxiety and I feel lonely and abandoned all the time. It sucks. But if it gets me my face back, then it's worth it.
Christmas and my birthday were excellent this year. I really got hooked up and so did my husband and my daughter. We even got a video camera from my mom. Luis got a laptop from his mom. His family still all buy presents for each other from each other. My family buys presents for all of us and I buy presents from all of us. It's pretty gay. Not that I really want presents from them. It's just the thought. I mean even his real dad sent a present to both of us and I've never even met him yet!
For New Year's, I worked until 11:30 and then drank a bottle of wine by myself because Luis had to get up at 3a.m. Oh, well. I took pics of the fireworks on the t.v.
I have only really made two specific resolutions this year. They are:
to only drink wine--no more rum
to only smoke skinny cigs, and then quit eventually.
I figure since I'm back on the Atkins and I'm burning ketones, the weight thing is already being taken care of. I want to weight like 138 or so. I want to be super-skinny this year. So that's about 50 lbs I need to lose. But like I said, I had an extremely fat year last year, so this year I want to be extremely thin. I deserve it. I wasted my last year in my twenties getting huge! So my first year in my thirties I will be small and bony (but healthy).

9:59 a.m. - 2006-01-06
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